Psychic Connections: Are you the psychic ‘type’?

psychic typeI was chatting to a new friend today about some unexpected and rather freaky metaphysical happenings she’s been experiencing.

‘I knew you’d be the type I could talk to about this stuff,’ she said. ‘My friends would just think I’m fucking insane.’

Once I’d stopped laughing at her rather hilarious turn of phrase, I had to agree with her. I am absolutely the ‘type’ to chat to about her weird freaky stuff because I’m not going to think she’s insane. For me it’s just another day in the slightly unusual world I inhabit these days.

I say ‘these days’ because once upon a time, I was a much more ‘normal’ person leading a far more ‘normal’ life. And if someone had told me 10 years ago about all the weird, wonderful, bizarre and inexplicable psychic happenings I would know about and eventually witness, I would have said they were fucking insane.

But what I find really interesting these days is how many conversations I have with outwardly ‘normal’ looking people about their psychic experiences. The more open I am about my sometimes unusual life, the more comfortable they feel to share their own happenings. And I feel honoured to hear their stories.

I guess that applies in most parts of our lives. When you are open to sharing your stories, even the freaky ones, it helps others to feel safe enough to share their own. And I think there is a wonderful magic in that process. Because through sharing our stories we all get to feel more ‘normal’ and a little less crazy…whatever that means for you.

Are you ready to create your life?

lifeSo here’s what I know to be true.

You can create the life you dream of. But you have to work for it. You have to put your money where your mouth is. And you have to believe you are worthy of your dream.

So start. Get up out of that chair and start.

Make that phone call. Start that blog. Register your business. Call the person you love and tell them you’re ready to take that chance. Enrol in that course. Start that exercise program.

Ignore those people who tell you that you’re crazy and deluded. You’ll need to trust yourself if you’re going to make it happen. So just take that first step and keep going.

Persist. Believe. Do.

Set your intention and give yourself small goals to reach along the way. Keep them small so they are attainable and eventually build up to something big.

Only you can do it. It’s your life and no one else is going to do it for you. So what are you waiting for?

I have faith in you.

Now it’s time for you to have faith in yourself

Psychics: We’re not all weird hippie chicks

hippie chickA few years ago I found myself driving to Byron Bay for my first spiritual retreat.

A lot of weird things had happened to me that year – smelling things that weren’t there, knowing things I couldn’t know, and spiritual guides showing up when I least expected it (i.e. during meditation in my yoga class) – and my mentor said the retreat would be helpful.

I wasn’t so sure.

Most of my contact with psychics until that point had been with women who lived outside the mainstream. They weren’t like me. None of my friends were psychic. My mentor was more mainstream but even so, I wasn’t sure how I would fit into this world I was suddenly part of.

As I drove the 2.5 hours to Byron Bay, I kept saying ‘I’m not a weird hippie chick, I’m not a weird hippie chick’ over and over in my head. It’s not that I had anything against hippies (be whoever you want to be, I say) but I definitely wasn’t one.

I was a public relations professional who wore suits and loved stilettoes. I had no desire to live an alternate, off-grid lifestyle. Psychics in my mind conformed to a cliché that, it turned out, wasn’t real at all.

During the five-day retreat I was constantly surprised at how normal everyone was. In fact, a lot of them were just like me and came from all walks of life.

There were some with hippie-like tendencies but there were also business people, a senior government administrator, a counselor and a dress designer. Others worked in nutrition, teaching and a range of other professions.

They were mainstream, just like me.

The retreat helped me to understand that maybe I wasn’t so strange after all and I wouldn’t need to abandon my mainstream life just because I was psychic. I could still be me.

These days I frequently meet people who are psychic. I’ll find myself in conversation with someone at a wedding, in a workshop or even on a bus and serendipitously it will come out somehow. I’ll be chatting about that part of my life and suddenly they’ll be sharing their own experiences. Sometimes they will have been too cautious to tell anyone about it before. And as we chat, I’m able to reassure them that they are normal and not going crazy.

My psychic journey has been tumultuous in many ways and it’s been a challenge to balance my life with the gifts and insights that have opened up to me.

But I am still me.

So for all of you out there who see the spirits of those who have passed over, have insights about things you can’t possibly know, feel the emotions of others or have other psychic happenings, please know you are not alone. You are one of many who walk this planet living a mainstream life.

And being psychic doesn’t mean you have to be a weird hippie chick.

If you’d like to meet other people who are beginning their psychic journey, please join us for A Night for Spiritual Beginners on Wednesday, 18 March 2015 in Brisbane. There are still a few spots available and you can find out more at http://wp.me/Pirqj-g1

The right one will fill you up

Feed your spirit

‘Thank you for saying yes,’ he said.

I was at the wedding reception for my good friend Jenelyn yesterday and her new husband Adam looked lovingly across at her as he said these words in his speech. It was a precious moment and we all felt honoured to share it with them on their special day.

Jenelyn waited a long time for the right man to come her way and she’s chosen well. She lights up when he is around and now radiates a new level of self-possession and calmness conjured from the magic of knowing she is nurtured and supported to be whoever she desires to be. Adam is the same.

Earlier in the week, my housemate Brad and my friend Meaghan had been discussing relationships and love when I heard Meaghan say, ‘The right one feeds you.’

‘The right person will fill you up.’

As I watched Jenelyn and Adam together, I was reminded of Meaghan’s words and the fundamental truth they held.

When you’re in a relationship with the right person, they fill you up. Their presence in your life will lift your spirit and fill you with light. Of course, there will be hard times and they will inevitably drive you crazy sometimes, but their presence will feed your spirit and you will feed theirs.

That’s just how it works.

Do we forget this vital point when we find ourselves buffeted this way and that in a stormy relationship that diminishes our spirit and makes us feel lesser? I think we do. Lord knows, when I look back at some of my previous relationships it’s clear I had forgotten that imperative for a strong relationship.

The right person will feed me. The right one will fill me with light and help me to shine brightly, just as I am. They will not seek to diminish me; they will help me stand alone in my power and reach all I wish to be. They will be there to catch me when I fall. They will not run from conflict, they will find a way through it so we can grow together.

And I will do the same for them.

It was these thoughts that flooded through my mind yesterday as I watched Jenelyn and Adam exchange their vows and openly express their love for each other. They have found the right one to walk forward with. They have found the one that fills them with light. They have found the one who feeds them.

Whoever you are, I wish the same for you.

 

 

And the quiet voice within kept whispering

VoiceI was thinking today about a man I worked with years ago (Max*) and how he worried about what other people said and thought about him. What others thought was more important than what he thought.

Max surrounded himself with people who were happy to judge him and tell him what was best. Sometimes they even convinced him that he was worth less than he was. That wasn’t hard to do because Max didn’t think he was worth much. He barely give himself a chance to think about what he wanted or believed.

Strangely (to him) in the midst of all this advice and knowledgeable opining, Max was unhappy. He felt there was something more out there but instead of exploring the unknown he thought, ‘What would I know anyway? Other people know better than me.’ So he stayed where he was. He stayed in the same job, surrounded himself with the same types of people and did the same things he’d always done.

And yet inside Max a quiet voice whispered, ‘There is more for you than this. You are worth more than this. Take a chance, follow your heart’s desire wherever it takes you.’

When I last saw Max he was doing a great job of drowning out his inner voice because, if he listened to it, he would have to change. And the very thought of change and the courage it would take to believe in himself (instead of others) brought up a tidal wave of fear. How can one person suddenly decide to live a different life, one that will make them truly happy, and risk the judgement of others? What would people think of him?

The implications of such actions were diabolical to Max so he struggled on.

I have been like Max. I have resisted listening to my inner voice. And I know how hard it is to back yourself and risk the judgement of others. But over time I’ve come to realise that my inner voice knows best even if it flies in the face of other people’s opinions.

It can hurt when other people judge you or say you’re making the wrong choices.

But they are not you.

They cannot hear your inner voice urging you forward to a better place, a place where you are happier and can be the person you are truly meant to be.

I hope Max decided to listen to that voice whispering deep inside him and I hope you decide to listen to yours too.

*names changed.

The Accountability Pact

AccountabilityMy editor rang yesterday and I cringed when I saw her number appear on my iPhone.

It wasn’t because Kristy is a horrible person – she is in fact, completely awesome. But I knew she’d ask about my editing and I would have to tell the truth…that I had barely started.

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you’ll know I’ve been working on a memoir for a few years now. I’m currently in the home stretch – I just need to finish editing and then publish it. All the words are there. They just need (as Kristy puts it) ‘a little tweaking’.

But I’ve been stuck for a couple of months.

I could give you a few reasonably valid reasons for my inertia during this time. For example, there’s my recovery from a break-up and another writing project I started just before New Years that now sits at 43,000 words and counting. I could tell you that my spiritual work has been increasing every day. Or I could say that a myriad of other ‘life’ things and work commitments have just got in the way and kept me busy.

All of these things would be true. But they don’t touch on the three real reasons on why I haven’t finished my first book.

I’ve been hiding from the editing because, being a memoir, some of the content is still a little sensitive and I have to be brave and look at myself honestly when I revisit it. I have to be willing to truly face and accept my demons when I re-read my words.

Secondly, I worry that my words will never be good enough and it will be criticised as self-indulgent claptrap. I know this fear is not unique to me, every author has it at some point. Nevertheless, it sits between me and the finish line.

Thirdly (and this is the big one), I’m not great at self-accountability. I can meet deadlines brilliantly for other people but my personal ones often go swishing past with no actual delivery. Is it about putting other people first? Partly. Is it about not having enough faith in myself to actually finish? Most definitely.

Sometimes I’m just brilliant at getting in my own way.

Yesterday I decided to try a different approach and get some support to get things done!

As Kristy, by her own confession, suffers from similar personal roadblocks, we decided to make an Accountability Pact. We each decided on two goals we were going to reach this month and committed to achieving them. We will meet at the end of March, in person, and if we haven’t achieved our goals we’ll have to explain why. I’ve even suggested that if this doesn’t work, we could implement consequences for failing to deliver in future months.

It’s only day two but so far we’re both off to a great start and have been sharing our achievements. And, if all goes well, I will have my book edited by the end of the month.

The Accountability Pact isn’t only about achieving goals. It’s about having someone out there who will cheer you on and help you celebrate when you reach a milestone. Even more importantly, it’s about someone helping you to get out of your own way.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Choose yourself before you plunge back in

AloneOver the past ten years I’ve noticed a trend that doesn’t seem to be diminishing and it’s played on my mind. I’ve tried to twist my perspective this way and that and I still haven’t come up with a definitive answer.

So today I thought I’d write about it and see if you had thoughts to share on the matter.

As a divorced woman in my 40s I’ve watched the relationships of numerous friends and acquaintances break-up. And it’s what has happened next that has me most perplexed.

Invariably the men move on to other relationships quickly while the women generally spend more time in recovery before even dipping their toe in the water again. Most men seem to barely draw breath before launching into something new. They can be emerging from a 10-year relationship or an intense affair and just a few weeks later they’re out there again, ready to repeat the experience. And they do. Within a very short space of time (often weeks or months) they’ll be ensconced in another relationship.

Most women on the other hand seem to take time for more self-reflection. They allow themselves the space to heal and are, often, not the least bit interested in trying on someone new until they’ve sorted through the mess of the old.

When I see this happening time and time again, I find it a little disconcerting.

Is it that men simply don’t need to process what went wrong? Do they truly have the capacity to just compartmentalise their past, stick it in a box and get on with it? Or are women just more inclined to navel-gaze and mull things over for extended periods of time?

As a woman, I can’t claim to know what goes on inside a man’s head when it comes to these things. However I can’t help but think it’s not a healthy pattern to simply go from one relationship into the next without giving yourself the space to think about what went wrong. I also wonder why many men appear to find this type of self-contemplation so hard to do.

Is it that men can’t be alone? Or are they conditioned through our culture and societal expectations that they must have a partner to be considered successful? And so their first thought is they must find someone new and simply forget what came before – they just have to ‘get on with it’ because there are ‘plenty more fish in the sea’.

Now, I’m not advocating that humans are meant to live without companionship. As a wise man once told me, ‘No one really wants to be alone and if they say otherwise they are lying.’ Relationships with other human beings with the accompaniments of companionship, acceptance and physical touch are a vital part of our existence. And like all human beings, I desire that for myself too.

But surely there is more room for the self-awareness that comes from being alone, outside a relationship. And why do most women seem more willing to have that experience and to grant themselves the space to do so?

Are women more adaptable? Can they more easily fill their own inner well? Have many men not been taught how to do this and instead look to have it filled by women?

One of my male friends would tell me it’s all about the male ‘lizard brain’ that is purely motivated by sex and not much else. But I know many women who also value sex highly as a vital way to connect with their partners, so it can’t all be about that.

Like I said at the start of this post, I don’t have an answer to all this. But I do question the behaviour when I see it time and time again. I also know that those emotions that have been shoveled under the carpet will eventually re-surface in a not-so-healthy way in a later relationship and the new partner will have to deal with the male’s unresolved issues from the past.

And, as a woman who’s been on the receiving end of that experience, I have to tell you it’s no fun.